


An Old Familiar Doorway, Part Two

by sadbenny



Series: An Old Familiar Doorway [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Domestic, Angst, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Short, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-07
Updated: 2015-11-07
Packaged: 2018-04-30 12:22:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 810
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5163689
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sadbenny/pseuds/sadbenny
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The last person Dean expected to run into was Benny.  The sudden confrontation stirs up complicated emotions.</p>
            </blockquote>





	An Old Familiar Doorway, Part Two

Sunshine had pulled the entire population of the city out onto the street, but until that moment Dean had only paid attention to one. **  
**

Yeah, it was cheesy.  Dean could hear his younger self mocking him for being such a sentimental old man.  Dean enjoyed his Sunday morning walks down to the market with Cas.  The fall air was cool.  Sunlight filtered through the changing leaves. Dean and Cas each carried an empty reusable bags-- Cas insisted, better for the environment-- His hand in his, they cut through the faceless crowd to select fresh foods and tasty delights for brunch.

For _brunch_ , for fucksake.   It was all so... domestic.

On the walk home, bags heavy, Dean looked up. 

He saw a face.  An old face.  Time had tried to hide it, but he saw past the lines.  It stopped him.  After a moment's hesitation he called out, and regretted it immediately.

“Benny?” **  
**

Benny looked as shocked as Dean to see him.  Dean could see the hurt on his face as Benny looked from him to Cas.  Dean felt his stomach knot.

"Wow, uh. Benny. It's been a long time."

"Yes. It has."

Feelings stirred.  

Dean had missed the melody of that cajun voice.  With it, the past came rushing back, smoke and flame, and he felt a brief urge to run back into it.  

He tightened his grip on Cas’s hand, warm in his.  It tethered him.  Cas squeezed Dean’s hand in return, a tender reassurance before releasing it to extend his hand to Benny.

“Hi, I’m Castiel.”  Cas said.  

“This is Benny.  An, uh, old friend.”  Dean said quickly as the two shook hands.  

“Good to meet you.”  Benny said, failing to completely conceal the hurt in his voice.

“We are having a small gathering for brunch.”  Cas said before Dean could stop him.  “You are welcome to join us.”  Cas held up his bag of goodies from the market, his smile friendly and genuine, in an effort-- Dean assumed-- to tempt Benny.

At first, Dean thought Benny was going to politely decline.  He saw the pause-- Benny averted his eyes downward, rubbed his brow-- the body language of a man about to excuse himself, ending this brief encounter as painlessly as possible.  

But a smirk slowly formed on Benny’s face.  He looked at Dean.

“Sure, brother.  I got nowhere to be.”

* * *

Dean didn’t remember exactly where he met Benny, but he remembered bringing him home.

Heat.  Excitement.  

There was so much pain at that time.  He drowned it with booze and tried to kill it with fire.

His father was missing.  Gone.  On a bender or a hunting trip.  Did it really matter which?  

His brother Sam was doing his own thing.  Dean didn’t want to drag him down. 

Lisa… was it Lisa?  Damn.  He should remember.  A person he cared about, important at the time, had dumped him or he dumped them.  It all melts together.  A tangle of hurt and hurting.

Dean had spent his days working in the garage.  His nights with whatever could keep him from thinking.  

Then there was Benny.

He met Benny at a bar.  Maybe.  Probably.  It could have been a party.  A co-worker, maybe?  No.  It had to have been a bar.  Benny was an outsider.  

He broke the pattern.  At first.

He saw the love in Benny’s eyes.  It was nice.

Dad called.  He was sick.  Sam wasn’t returning his calls.  Dean called Sam.  Sam wasn't returning _his_ calls.

And Benny was there.  Always _there_.  It was… nice.

For a time.

Hanging on Dean was the feeling, **always the nagging feeling** , that-- 

While he did **care** about Benny...

He _needed_ him...

He _wanted_ him...

But he didn’t love him.  Not in the way Benny loved Dean.  

He wanted to.

He should.

Why didn't he?

Was he not capable?  Maybe there was something broken in Dean. Maybe he couldn't.

The guilt accumulated.  Building and billowing until it was **smothering**.

He gave Benny the key in the hopes that bringing him closer would fix it, but it made it worse.  

Benny was **always** there.

And Dean was choking from the ash in his lungs.

* * *

They were at the doorway.  

Castiel dug through his trench coat, searching for the key.  

Dean dreaded entering the apartment, but felt powerless to stop it.  

Benny smirked.

“Want to use mine?”

Benny held up a key.   **The** key.  He still had _the fucking key_.  Shit.

Cas looked puzzled, but he took it.  More puzzled still when it worked in the door.  For one small moment, Dean saw a look of realization cross over Cas’s face.  It passed quickly, and Cas turned to smile back at Benny.

“Thanks!  Good thing you still had that.  I’m always locking us out.”

Cas held the door open.

There was no stopping it.

He had to go in.

_To be continued._


End file.
